BeerDull Tedious ShiteNASCARThe Sporting Life

Don’t Take Your Guns…

gunsJoey Logano Wins The Masters (picture not related)


Of all the homo-erotic metaphors out there, the most compelling and dangerous ones always seem to involve guns.

More people were murdered with guns in the past week than were killed in the Boston Marathon attack. They will continue to be murdered at an alarming rate despite our best or worst efforts involving gun-control, community policing, and other forms of social responsibility. For a point of reference, I started this last Sunday night while off on a trek to New England. But all I had written that Sunday night was: “Of all the homo-erotic metaphors out there, the most compelling and dangerous ones always seem to involve guns…”  That, and the picture of Kyle Busch trying to pull off a Woody from Toy Story imitation upon his victory last Sunday (April 14th) in the Texas 500 (sic) at, where else, the Texas Motor Speedway.

Gun control legislation, and the hysterical jackassery swirling around it (make of that, dear readers, what you will) was certainly mumbling somewhere in the back of my mind. The week prior to the race, the State of Connecticut had passed some tough gun legislation in the wake of the shooting at Sandy Hook Elementary School. Our President came to Hartford for the signing of the legislation into law. And since I was about 20 miles down the road from Hartford at the time, it was fresh in my mind.

But my real reason for shining the mirror on guns was the fact that the OFFICIAL title of last Sunday’s race was the NRA 500. As in National Rifle Association. And the fact that the OFFICIAL broadcaster of the race, FOX, didn’t refer to the race as the NRA 500 during the entire broadcast. Instead, the referred to it as the Texas 500. Hmmm…FOX snubs the NRA? Maybe there’s hope the world after all ((Sorry, I was just mumbling again)).

Also of note, several drivers, Brad Kesolowski being one of them, deftly dodged the issue about the NRA ahead of the race claiming he didn’t want to talk politics. Junior’s observation that the NRA and Texas seem to go together was almost like damning it all with faint praise. As I recall, there were some law enforcement officials killed recent in Texas with guns. So why not just celebrate the shit out of it since Texas loves guns so damn much?

Now don’t get me wrong. I’m all for guns for hunters and responsible citizens and all that, but the next time I see the phrase NRA appended to a number between 250 and 600 in the context of a NASCAR race, the sponsor had better the National Restaurant Association.



guns2Adam Scott docked 25 driver points. His crew chief fined $100,000… (picture not related)


I figured something out last weekend. The reason why a lot (or some) of the drivers in the Sprint Cup garage don’t like/respect Joey Logano.

It had been nagging me since Joey and Smoke had their little bit of argy-bargy at California. Smoke called him him (I’m paraphrasing here) a rich spoiled puss who never had to get his hands dirty like the rest of us. Now, that’s not exactly a truthful statement of Logano’s racing pedigree. Yes, his family was little more well-to-do that some, Logano worked his up through the local series and the local tracks. He’d didn’t get handed the #20 Home Depot ride at Joe Gibbs just because he was a  fresh-faced and handsome kid with a winning smile. But to some in the NASCAR garage it seemed that way.

I had dinner Friday night in Joey Logano’s hometown of Middletown, Connecticut ((at the amazing Eli Cannon’s Tap Room, if you’re curious)). And on Sunday, as I watched the thrilling conclusion to the Masters, it hit me.

Joey Logano doesn’t look he’s a NASCAR driver. He looks and carries himself more like he’s a professional golfer.

“Hey Tony…mind if I play through?”



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