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Deutsche Abstiegbahn

borussia dortmund

Jurgen Klopp

jurgen klopp

borussia dortmund relegationUber was bin dies krachenscheiss schwindligauslachen???


I really like Jürgen Klopp and Borussia Dortmund, and I hope you, and he excuse my Bâtard-Allemand…. But there’s no other way of putting in I suppose. Well, maybe there is, but that’s my story and I’m sticking to it.

Anyway, this  time I’m writing only about the Bundesliga. No Premier League, NASCAR, F1 this time. And you should also be thankful that I’m not writing this entire post in German.

Dortmund and Jürgen Klopp are facing a terrible dilemma.

13 games into the 34 game Bundesliga season, they find themselves bottom of the table and on the verge of taking a sad ride on the Duetsche Abstiegbahn down to the Zwie Bundesliga where the likes of Union Berlin, 1860 München, Karlsruher FC, and Erzgebirge Aue perennially dwell.

Yes, Borussia Dortmund is at bottom of the table with 11 points from 13 games. Bayern Munchen is perched at the top on 33 points from 13 games. This is beyond any rational explanation or understanding. Dortmund have, in Jürgen Klopp, one the best coaches in the Bundesliga. They have great players on their team, from Marco Reus and Mats Hummels to Pierre-Emerich Aubemayang, Jakob Blaszczykowski, Nevin Subotic, & Ciro Immobile.

If they sucked, I would say so. But that’s the hell of it, the irony. We don’t suck, but the scoreboard says otherwise.



jurgen klopp

borussia dortmundEintracht Frankfurt 2      Borussia Dortmund 0


This was the match that has left Dortmund on the bottom of the table. This a match they should have taken at least a point, if not all of them. A early strike from Alexansandr Meier put Franfurt ahead.  But a late miscue early on between Ginter and Weidenfaller, handsed Frankfurt a second and sealed their fate.

It’s been a lot of that lately. Sloppy mistakes. Poor finishing. There’s been a lot of that this season from Dortmund in the Bundesliga.

And thus, they are bottom of the table, riding that Relegation Train, the Deutsche Aubstiegbahn, to a place Borussia Dortmund hasn’t been since 1975.

When Jürgen Klopp took over as gaffer in 2008-2009 season, Borussia Dortmund had finished the prior season 13th in the table. Klopp led them to 6th in table, then 5th the next season. In 2010-11 season, Dortmund won the Bundesliga with Leverkusen and Bayern Munchen finishing 2nd and 3rd respectively. Dortmund defended their championship in the 2011-12 by winning the Bundesliga with a record high 81 points. Bayern recaptured the Bundesliga the next season shattering Dortmund’s points tally by notching 91, and won it again last season with 90 points. Dortmund finished second the last two seasons.

But in 2014-15, for some reason no one can quite figure out, they are down for the count at the moment, reeling, in a place where the Paderborns, Stuttgarts and Hoffenheims of the Bundesliga habitually dwell. And yes, I hate pluralizing the singular, but it’s Friday and I leave for work in an hour, so fock it.

The truly bewildering this is how well they’re doing in the Champions League against the elite teams of Europe!



borussia dortmundArsenal 2     Borussia Dortmund 0


Despite this is little stumble, they’ve been perfect in Group D. They’ve outscored their opponents 13-3 and are already qualified for the round of 16 with a top seed from their table.

To get a perspective on how bewildering their season has been so far:

  • In 5 Champions League games, Dortmund has scored 13 goals.
  • In 13 Bundesliga games, Dortmund has scored 14 goals.
  • In 5 Champions League game, Dortmund has 12 points.
  • In 13 Bundesliga games, Dortmund has 11 points.


I mean what the fock! Really now? How does this even happen?

Today’s match at Signal Iduna Park with Hoffenheim has been dubbed “High Noon” by Jürgen Klopp. It’s a match that could very well break a season that is already in tatters.

Or, Dortmund will shoot there way out of the relegation zone and all will get back a semblance of normalcy. Semblance, since the hole they’ve falen is too get back to more than mid-table.

Today, at High Noon, then. Or 8PM German time. And now, it’s time for…..


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