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| I'm not really sure exactly when and how I evolved, within myself, this concept of A Fear Of Blondes. Perhaps it evolved out of a discussion with someone about how NONE of my wives or girlfriends have ever been blonde. Not officially, anyway. I suppose there could be provided some documentary and historical poetic eveidence to the contrary. Some determined time-traveler who also happens to to be fairly psychic could perhaps plumb the depths of the terrible past and show evidence of some cascading series of wistful moments involving blondes, or a blonde. But for all intents and purposes the have truthful and cognitive value, all the REAL wives and girlfriends have been brunette or red-heads....so maybe, deep down in inside I really DO have this Fear of Blondes.
I know it was not ALWAYS that way. In kindergarten, and through 1st or 2nd grade I had a crush on this girl who was BLONDE and looked just like Gale Storm from that classic 50's TV show My Little Margie (even though Gale Storm was naught, technically, a blonde). So...this fear was not always there.... Then again, the days have run, as Charles Bukowski would put it, like wild horses over the hills. Time seems to have forged this fear on it's own anvil. Time is like a blacksmith....and the one person in town you do NOT fuck with, is the blacksmith. I'm thinking that as time went on, there must have been something about blonde hair that began to provoke within me this inner fear---a subtle sort of fear, a pale brown fear----I dont know what it is...or why it is....with me and blondes, that nothing seemed to go quite right. I'm naught quite sure what it is.
But I DO know what it is NOT. It is NOT and has nothing to do with the typical, commonly-accepted, jocular, anecdotal, pre-concieved notions about Ding-Dong Dizzy Dumb Blondes----you know the ones about how this blonde gets stuck at the computer for days and days because the instructions on the screen say PRESS ANY KEY to continue, and she can't find the ANY key. Nope....it's NOTHING like that at all. There are a LOT of smart blondes out there.....don't kid yourself.
But all the same, there is this FEAR OF BLONDES. And I dont know what it is exactly. But I know that it's completely true. So in the spirit of and celebration of this somehow primal fear, I present a page entitles FEAR OF BLONDES. My misguided and no doubt notional attempt to convey, in some mystic way, what this all truly means.
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